This is my life
And everything else
Revolves around it
And as it revolves
I live it
This is his life
And everything else
Is absolutely still
And as it is still
He moves it
This is her life
And everything else
Is happening now
And as it happens
She creates it
This is our life
And everything else
Falls into place
And as it falls
We enjoy it
This is their life
And everything else
Ceases to exist
And as it ceases
They drown in it
This is life
And everything else
Builds it up
And as it builds
It is lived
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29 comments:
absoulutely fabulous!!!!
absoulutely love it!
its the kind of poem which should be read out loud and i have already it thrice, i think...super...:)
gulnaz - Thanks a lot, glad you liked it so.
This is creation!! An intricately woven lace of a poem and the marrying of philosophy to it..loved it.
:)
Would it be possible to add me to your list of links or your blogroll? If you want I could link back. Please post your reply on my comments. The url is http://www.chiraag.co.uk
It would benefit our blogshares a lot.
Life's such a mystery to me...
Beautiful, as always! :)
Miss Qt
miss-qt.com
Thanks for your prompt reply on my comment! Looks like you are online right now..LOL ;)..NOW theres a nice thought..eh?!
Wow...I love the build up, beginning from I the centre of the universe. Agree with Gulnaz, reading it aloud gives an even greater impact!
This is a well-organized poem. I like its progression from it, to him, to her, to our, their, and finally, it again. Life is all about learning to live while finding happiness.
amazing!!!!
"This is his life
And everything else
Is absolutely still
And as it is still
He moves it"
These lines especially bring out the power we have over our own lives.
The flow of thought is fabulous!
superb!!!
Pincushion - Thanks! Glad you liked it. I went offline when your second comment came. ;-)
Chiraag - Sorry, but I don't play blogshares anymore.
Miss Qt, Nicole Braganza, KJ - Thanks.
stan laurel - Yes, life is a full circle.
Brood Mode - Thanks. Had already linked you a while ago!
finnegan - Thanks. I don't write poetry in any other language. What else were you wondering about my peripatetic life?
Just my bloody luck! Story of my life..life IS offline N so r u!!LOL!
Fabulous poem. I love its flavour of eastern mysticism which speaks such sense of such inevitable things. It has a 'musical' quality to it that I really like. thanks.
Pincushion - That was cryptic ;-)
Cocaine Jesus - Yes, I wrote it with music in my mind. Glad you could pick it up.
the stage set by the Master Planner, the story outlined by HIM.. the story of LIFE being played by us...each a different story .. no two stories alike...my life, his life, their life.....difference from reel life - no rehersals, no re-takes.... u get just one chance..and it is lived...
Simplicity at its best. Almost see it as a song.
such a pretty poem. so simple, and its so pleasing. life's a funny funny thing we do. gets a little insane no, once in a while? and you are blogging. so much at that. what's with you saying you cant find the time to?
Phal
"I’m looking to the sky to save me
Looking for a sign of life
Looking for something help me burn out bright
I’m looking for complications
Looking cos I’m tired of lying
Make my way back home
When I learn to fly (high)"
Isn't it amazing how each one of us thinks our life is unqiue, but in the grand scheme of things, there is a little bit of his,her,their life in each one of our lives?
Lovely poem August - interesting take on the perspectives, and as Gulnaz said, it has a wonderful oral quality to it!
Heheh - I kinda echo Phal on the blogging alot comment! ;-) Not that I'm complainging abt it tho!
Liked this one a lot! Always fascinated by poems with a philosophical tilt, and this one was truly marvellous in that sense.
This piece feels like one of those moments when we stop running and take stock of everything around us, defining Life as we know it, before we resume running. And you seem to have run a lot! :)
thoughts - Thanks for your perspective!
mermaid - I wrote it with music in my mind.
Phal, Geetanjali - Thanks. Somehow I feel I am not doing as much as I would like to. :-)
J - Lovely words, aren't they?
musafir - Thanks a lot. I am just 'running to stand still'. :-)
once again it's wonderful ..
I loved the 'This is life... it is lived' part :)
ooo, facinating. This is one of those few poems that I could re-read constantly.
Thank you so much for sharing it!
sigh...nice, very nice
Great -- for its simplicity.
AmitKen, dewdrop, Anonymous Poet - Thanks.
TwistedNoggin - Thanks for dropping by here and commenting. Look forward to seeing you around.
Articulation kills thought?
Right when I was convinced that translating thoughts for anybody or anything makes them so diluted, I came across this. Maybe it's the effort, maybe it's the words, or simply, it's the eye. No connection, but it reminded me of a miles davis song, fast car. The progression's similar. I think so. You may beg to differ. :)
It was indeed a distinct pleasure reading.
- neeru
neeru - I won't differ. I like hearing different takes on the writing. Thanks for coming by and commenting. Do drop a link if you are back.
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